Gamers Nosh: KFC Boneless Chicken

In Gamer's Nosh by Patrick Fogarty0 Comments

KFC has done it again. First the culinary world was turned upside down with their game changing mashed potato bowl. Patton Oswalt nailed it with his bit with the mashed potato bowl but I don’t care it was damn good. And now KFC is at it again with their boneless fried chicken, cleverly promoted with the slogan “I Ate the Bones.”  

When KFC announced that they were offering their crispy delicious goodness without the bones I was stoked.  When I started to open that well known rectangle box and pulled the paper apart I felt like Ralphie from Christmas Story hoping I would find my Red Ryder, and I did. The standard combo came with two very large pieces, one white one dark, of boneless chicken, a biscuit and my choice of side. When I say big, I mean big.  It resembled a mega sized chicken tender but with the Colonel’s original peppery crunchy crust.  Looking like I was doing a science experiment, I pulled the chicken out of the box and laid it upon my plastic tray. I grabbed a piece that looked like a breast first and pulled it apart. The meat was juicy, white and looked like it came from a real chicken instead of a machine that crushes chicken parts together to form a chicken-like concoction.  Ah hah, I knew there was a catch.  As I started to dissect my breast (the pre-pubescent teen in me just laughed at that visual) you could see how the meat was folded over to give the piece a more uniform shape for even cooking.  Not exactly thrilled with this but still have high hopes as far as taste.  Pulling the skin away from the chicken was like any other real fried chicken crispy on the outer fried layer and soft fatty deliciousness connected the skin.  Yes, this could be the next big thing!  Okay, time for a taste.  I am having mixed emotions right now.  A little set off by the folding of the chicken but the crust made my high expectations stay right where they were.  I think I hear angels singing.  First bite had a great taste of real fried chicken.  It’s crunchy, salty, peppery, juicy…yep, I like it.   Wait, opinion is wavering.  Second bite contained some connective tissue and tendons that were invading my greasy goodness. 

            Okay, so the first piece was good but a bit of a letdown when it came to the second bite but I am going to be a trooper and try the second piece.  First let me say I am a bit biased.  I am not a big fan of dark meat.  I am a breast man. The piece looked like a thigh and had the same golden coating.  It reacted like its counterpart with the exception of being slightly fattier due to it being dark meat.  If you are a thigh and leg man you will likely be happy but personally I wasn’t a fan.    I blame this more on my own pickiness than on the Colonel. 

Over all I was really surprised on how good this chicken was being from a fast food restaurant. I won’t go as far as saying this will replace my fried chicken joint but it will do in a pinch when you want fried chicken on the go or you’re in a time crunch.  Only real fault is that KFC felt the need to make it appear to be a real piece of bone in chicken when they should have just taken the meat and gave that a nice batter.  No need to manipulate the chicken into a better looking breast.  I understand that it helps with cooking but I would still have rather NOT bitten into the stringy grossness that I did.  Insider tip, when you order the meal don’t forget to ask for a sauce like hot or BBQ. Take the sauce and dump it the box with the chicken and shake it. Now you have supersized boneless chicken wings.  KFC you are a winner with this item – keep the juicy greasy goodness coming!

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